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Epic Rant Is Epic

We here at the front offices of the Santa Lechuga Power League can go through an entire season without hearing a peep from our owners about how the league runs, what we might do to improve, what's top-of-mind about the league, what folks hate about the league, just how much folks hate us, etc. Heck, we have gone multiple seasons in a row without any commentary being shared with us, which is fine by us 'cause, you know, our egos are impenetrable and we wouldn't listen to what you're saying anyway. "Waaa. Waaa. Waaa. Is Charlie Brown's teacher talking or something?"

But then, last night happens, in what we imagine is the after-effect of many shots of some choice libations. This rant happens:
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Boy, howdy, that's so awesome. With all the earmarks of the Unabomber stumbling upon three cases of lost Scotch in a cabin with spotty Wifi connection that he is somehow compelled to use, this is a rant so excellent that we can honestly say that it reinvigorates our desire to have owners share their honest if unhinged thoughts about us with us more often. This is pure beauty. But, please, other owners, before you rant, use this template: Alcohol + Observations about League + Random Slams of Fellow Owners + Send Button. Anything less than that will fall very flat and not tickle us nearly as much.

While we will not disclose who shared this rant with us — we'll just say he wears jorts to dance around his moped every Mother's Day — we will say it is fun to see one of our owners rip this fantasy league apart while indiscriminately throwing other owners (well, just one other owner, to be fair) under the bus. Thanks, dancing jorts momma's boy, we needed that.

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