SLPL '19 Home

We're Up and Running!

Our website is up-and-running!

Our stats and standings are up-and-running! As before, we are using a mambo-jumbo spreadsheet that is converted to a webpage, so look for the tabs at the bottom of the page to navigate the various pages of information, including how our sweet pot is calculated and distributed.

Please do us a favor and go to the Rosters tab to take a look-see at your roster. What are you checking for? To make sure we didn’t bungle anything, which is wicked-easy to do when you’re manually entering 15 players for 28 teams players. If we made a mistake, let us know by making a trade here and explaining our mistake in the Message at the bottom of that page.

Once again, welcome to the 2019 Santa Lechuga Power League! Good luck!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

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Welcome to the 2019 Santa Lechuga Power League!

Thanks for joining the 2019 edition of the Santa Lechuga Power League! You will be happy to know:
  • We have 28 teams, a dip from recent seasons, which means the deadweight of lazy, apathetic, struggling owners from previous seasons is gone and the competition is more concentrated
  • Given the above, this should be a tough, hard-fought, awesome season!
  • We have a healthy $2800 pot to kick things off
  • Our website — you are looking at it right now — along with our stats and standings will be fully up-and-running early next week (sorry about that folks, but we're headed to Michigan for the weekend and won't be able to work on league-related things until we get back)
Here are the standings from our stats provider through yesterday's big Opening Day:

Opening Day 2

Welcome to the 2019 SLPL! Good luck. We really hope you enjoy the five-cent Tequila Poppers and our trademarked Cabbage-On-a-Stick!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

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Kathy Lamkin Crowned 2019 SLPL HOF Death Pool Champ!

Hey, look at us! We give out money when the season begins!

With the first pitch of today’s first game, Make Fantasy Baseball Great Again! owner Kathy Lamkin was officially* crowned the 2018 winner of the Phil Rizzuto Memorial Hall-of-Fame Death Pool, thereby officially closing out the 2018 season. “I would like to thank Red Schoendienst and Frank Robinson for allowing me to scrape $225 out of the pot. I didn't want them to die, but, look, we all die. I'm sure Red and Frank would be happy to know their deaths went to a good cause,” Kathy said after being crowned champ. “And before you get all mad at me for saying that, look, I'm getting ready to move. Every dollar I earn means a lot to me.”

*When we say "officially," we mean that as of right now we know of no other Hall-of-Famers who died before today’s first pitch since Frank Robinson walked into the Iowa cornfields in February. If news stories come through that someone kicked it before this afternoon’s games, we'll have to revise our officialness status and see what shakes out.

For Those Interested In Such Things
Here’s how the Hall-of-Fame Death Pool points are scored: Points are earned by subtracting the reported age of the dirt-napper at the time of his death (rounded down to the most-recent birthday) from 100 and multiplying the result by 5. So:
• An 80-year-old would get 100-80=20*5=100 points.
• A 40-year-old would get 100-40=60*5=300 points.

And here’s how the Magic Number works: The team with the Magic Number closest to the Date-of-Death (DoD) will get an extra 25 points. If that team's Magic Number matches the DoD, the team will instead get 50 extra points.

For Those Creeped Out by Such Things
Here's how we justify to ourselves having a Hall-of-Fame Death Pool: "Their major contributions to the world already behind them, baseball Hall-of-Famers will never get the glory they received on the day they were inducted into the Hall-of-Fame until their funerals. We honor living HOFers by putting them into a Death Pool and hoping they will soon receive that final glorious moment in the sun … before they are buried or cremated."

Congratulations, Kathy!
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The 2019 Season Has Officially Begun!


The SLPL Bobblehead-of-Lettuce


Good luck to one and all!

While we get our act together and set up the league, here are some MLB links — also found in the menu bar up top — you might find useful during the season:

See the 2019 Rules | Pay Your Entry Fee

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The 2019 SLPL Season Is Officially About To Launch


Getchyer roster in, STAT!

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

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There's Still One 2018 Champ To Be Crowned

For those who don't know, the Santa Lechuga Power League features a Hall-of-Fame Death Pool. Click here to see how it works. As stated in the rules, each season's Death Pool runs from first pitch of one season to the first pitch of the following season, then the champ is crowned. This means that we still have one payout to make for the 2018 season. Currently, Make Fantasy Baseball Great Again! owner Kathy Livernois stands to win the $225 if she can hold onto the lead for a bit more than 24 hours.

Incidentally, if you're skeeved out by our Death Pool, you are not required to play. You can opt out by leaving the HOF portion of your roster submission blank.
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ICYMI: Join the SLPL In Six Easy Steps


The Santa Lechuga Power League is a campy little fantasy baseball league. It’s no slick-CBS-Sportsline-type league where nobody knows anybody and everybody just wants to end up in the 51st-percentile or above to get bragging rights over a bunch of strangers. I mean, who brags to strangers? Instead, the SLPL is made up of family and friends and extended family and friends of brothers Joe Livernois and Tony Livernois, who run the thing for their own amusement and for the amusement of said family and friends and extended family and friends. And because Jay (as his family knows him) and Tony are simple-minded goofs, they run a simple, goofy little league with big-time payouts. Points are earned using home runs and strikeouts. That's it. Oh, and as a side bet we track the heartbeats of Hall-of-Famers in our exclusive (but entirely optional) Hall-of-Fame Death Pool. It’s that easy.

If you’re thinking about joining, here are six basic steps you need to complete to become a new owner:
  1. Learn the rules. Abide.
  2. See the payouts. Drool.
  3. Review our tutorial for picking a roster. Learn.
  4. Select your team and submit your roster. Good luck!
  5. Pay already. Like, before Opening Day so you can earn two free trades.
  6. Contact us. But only with compliments or questions. No whining. We hate whining. We hate whining so much that we almost sound like we are whining when we express how much we hate whining.
Plan on joining us in 2019, wontchya? Before saying no, see this list of ten reasons to join. Maybe that'll convince you.

And if you’re looking for a little light reading once the season gets started, why not catch up on the History of the SLPL or read up on the evil Bobblehead-of-Lettuce?

We hope you can join!

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

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FAQ About Paying Entry Fees Up Front

Question: I love that we are asking owners to pay up front. Doing it the last several seasons got rid of the half-assers and left the league to folks who really want to play. Question, though: You say the entry fee covers the ownership fee and up to eight trades. If I don't use all eight trades, can I expect a refund at the end of the season?
Ha ha ha. No. We encourage an active ownership group that's vying to win, not half-assers who sit around waiting for refunds because they forgot to use their trades. Use 'em or lose 'em, baby. Use 'em or lose 'em.

Question: What are the downsides of asking owners to pay $100 up front?
None, really. Our Pots continue to be big. Heck, last year's pop was a big $3,780. Nifty, right?

Question: Upsides?
In addition to the fact that Commissioner Rube Furrow won't need to pull monies out of his own pockets each year to pay the winners, the league ended up with a higher proportion of owners who are real players and a lower proportion of apathetic owners, who always seemed to be the ones who skip out on paying what they owe, anyway. Oh, and did we mention that our Pot last year got up to $3,780? Yeah, our owners got paid all that … and faster than previous seasons because we already had all the money in the bank to immediately distribute.

Question: You mean payouts to champs didn't go down?
In fact, as mentioned above, payouts went up. A bunch. The minimum payout in 2018 was $175, which doubled the minimum payout from the 2014 season.

Question: How do I submit a team and pay my entry fee?
That's the spirit! Submit a roster here. Pay your entry fee here.

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

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In A World Without Decent Fantasy Baseball...


This video is now several years old, but we still love it. So much drama! So much action! So many drunk people! Now, these knuckleheads just need to sober up ...


The key takeaway? That the Santa Lechuga Power League fills the gaping vacuum in the universe known as “decent fantasy baseball.” How could you possibly not join?

By the way, where you see the date in the video for March 23, 2011? Yeah, ignore that. Think March 28, 2019 instead. That's when you need to have your rosters to us for this season.

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

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More Than $48,000 Reasons to Join

Looking for a reason to join the Santa Lechuga Power League? Over the past 18 seasons we have given owners more than $48,000 reasons.

Pots


Do it. Join.

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

Comments

Join the SLPL In Six Easy Steps

The Santa Lechuga Power League is a campy little fantasy baseball league. It’s no slick-CBS-Sportsline-type league where nobody knows anybody and everybody just wants to end up in the 51st-percentile or above to get bragging rights over a bunch of strangers. I mean, who brags to strangers? Instead, the SLPL is made up of family and friends and extended family and friends of brothers Joe Livernois and Tony Livernois, who run the thing for their own amusement and for the amusement of said family and friends and extended family and friends. And because Jay (as his family knows him) and Tony are simple-minded goofs, they run a simple, goofy little league with big-time payouts. Points are earned using home runs and strikeouts. That's it. Oh, and as a side bet we track the heartbeats of Hall-of-Famers in our exclusive (but entirely optional) Hall-of-Fame Death Pool. It’s that easy.

If you’re thinking about joining, here are six basic steps you need to complete to become a new owner:
  1. Learn the rules. Abide.
  2. See the payouts. Drool.
  3. Review our tutorial for picking a roster. Learn.
  4. Select your team and submit your roster. Good luck!
  5. Pay already. Like, before Opening Day so you can earn two free trades.
  6. Contact us. But only with compliments or questions. No whining. We hate whining. We hate whining so much that we almost sound like we are whining when we express how much we hate whining.
Plan on joining us in 2019, wontchya? Before saying no, see this list of ten reasons to join. Maybe that'll convince you.

And if you’re looking for a little light reading once the season gets started, why not catch up on the History of the SLPL or read up on the evil Bobblehead-of-Lettuce?

We hope you can join!

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

Comments

Ten Reasons to Join the Santa Lechuga Power League

TL/DR (Too Long Didn't Read) version: We have ten reasons to join the Santa Lechuga Power League. Getchyer rosters in by Opening Day, March 28, 2019. Recruit.

Now, the details:

While there are literally thousands of reasons to join the Santa Lechuga Power League -- last year alone the number of reasons equaled $3,780 -- we have listed our ten favorite reasons, which you can find by clicking on these words.

Remember, you have until Thursday, March 28, first pitch, to submit your roster. Grab your spot quick-like by using the form linked to these words.

Oh, and be sure to recruit some new owners. It's always fun to have a lot of fresh blood in the waters ... er ... fresh owners in the league.

Good luck picking your roster!

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

Comments

Our First Review Is In ...

The first review of our new-look website is in and it comes courtesy of longtime owner Vince Livernois. Here it is, in its entirety:

Fresh by Kook and the Gang


Thanks, Vinnie. We agree.

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

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The 2019 Season Is Less Than Two Weeks Away!

The 2019 Santa Lechuga Power League season is less than two weeks away! We hope that your offseason was memorable, that your family is good, and that you missed us enough to want to join the 2019 season. And if you didn’t miss us that much, did I mention that our nine champs last year split $3,780?

Unlike the actual major leagues, there are no rules changes to announce in the SLPL this year. Hey, this ol' boy of a league is running like a top. Why change?

Here's how things work to enter the league and to make trades:
  • The entry fee is $100, which must be paid in full up front. This covers your ownership fees ($20) and your first eight trades ($80).
  • If you pay your entry fee of $100 before the first pitch on Opening Day, March 28, 2018, you will earn two free trades.
  • If you don't pay your $100 entry fee before the season begins, you will have until April 11, 2018 to pay it. If we haven't received full payment from you by then, you will be deleted from the league. Divisions will be created after owner deletions have been made.
  • For every new owner you recruit into the league, up to three, you will earn a free trade.
  • You can buy up to ten more trades at $10 per. However, a trade will not go into effect until the day after you submit the trade or the day after we receive payment, whichever is latest.
And we have a nifty new look at our website this season. You're looking at it this very minute.

Here are key links:
As always, we're always an email away if you have questions or comments.

We hope you can join us again for another nifty season.

And you folks who have been off the radar for a while: Come join us again. We’d love to have you!

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

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