SLPL '19 Home

Game 7!!!

mlb_postseason_04a

We love Game 7s!

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Checking In On SLPL

mlb_postseason_00

Unless the Nats can claw their way back into this Series, tonight we will be awarding the Overall Championship trophy. While it will likely go to DJay Andersen, the owner of Deeger's Dogs who has dominated most of the Regular Season and held tight to the top spot throughout the playoffs with some deft end-of-season trades. There is, however, an ever-so-slight chance DJay could lose the top spot, but only if either Altuve or Gurriel or both connect for multiple homers. Here are the rosters of the teams that could be heard from before this is all over for 2019:

2019_playoff_contenders 00005

2019_playoff_contenders 00001

2019_playoff_contenders 00004

2019_playoff_contenders 00002

2019_playoff_contenders 00003

While you keep an eye on your favorite, we will root for a Game 7!

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Be The Team You Were Last Time You Were In Houston

mlb_postseason_04a

C'mon, Nats, find a way to get it to seven.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

At Least Six

mlb_postseason_04a

Tied up at two apiece. We're getting at least six!

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Good

mlb_postseason_04a

While I'm rooting for the Nats, I'm want them to win in seven, not sooner. So, good, I'm happy for Houston's win last night.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Those Nats, Man! They Are Fun

mlb_postseason_04a

I had the feeling the Nats would compete, but I had no idea that they would look this good. Damn. This is a fun bunch to watch.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Here We Go

mlb_postseason_04a

Should be a good one!

Meanwhile, enjoy this interesting article from Maddog's Maulers owner Mike Skoien, who sent this to us last week with the comment: "'Juiced', 'De-juiced', WTF MLB this is our National pastime (NFL be damned) for Pete’s sake!" Thanks, Mike!

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Thus Bringeth the Championshipth Serieses to a Closeth

And with that Houston win, the Championship Serieses are over. In all, hitters on Santa Lechuga rosters slammed 15 dongs and struck out 118 times while SLPL pitchers threw 111 strikeouts and gave up 9 homers. So far in the playoffs, there have been 42 HRs and and 274 K by rostered hitters and 307 Ks and 30 HRs by rostered hitters. And here's how the Overall standings look going into the World Series:


The Series kicks off Tuesday night. There are nine rostered hitters and 6 rostered pitchers left in play for SLPL owners. Will DJay Andersen's Deeger's Dogs continue to hold the top spot? Or, can another team tear it away. Stay tuned!

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

I Like It When the Yankees Sierra the Bed In the Playoffs


How many errors?! Heh.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Nats!


I knew the Nats were for real. And that Yankee's series is surely trending in the right direction.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

That's More Like It


An extra inning walk-off against the Yankees is good.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

C'Mon, Stros, Pick Up Your Game


The Astros look anemic. The Nats look for real.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Sánchez Is a No. 4?!


Gotta love a phenomenal start from a No. 4 in the postseason. Wow.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Thus Bringeth the Divisionith Serieses to a Closeth


And with that Houston win, the Division Serieses are over. In all, including the Wild Card game, hitters on Santa Lechuga rosters slammed 27 dongs and struck out 156 times while SLPL pitchers threw 196 strikeouts and gave up 21 homers. Nice, right? And here's how the top of the standings look as of tonight:

2019 slpl thru division seires

The league championship serieses are up next, starting with tomorrow's first game. With 20 SLPL rostered hitters and and 12 rostered pitchers, it should be a fun round of playoffs.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

I Love Elimination Games!


You just never know what's going to happen in sports. That Braves-Cardinals game, man, that was brutal. But that Nats-Dodgers game, even more so, especially for only one of the best pitchers in our generation. Wow.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Make That A Third Game 5


See, now, this is a playoffs! Three out of four Division Serieses are going to Game 5s! Yay-ess!

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Two Game 5!


Four playoff games in a day! Two of which lead to Game 5s!!

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

That's 15


Dayamn. Fifteen Ks. Dayama.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Four Playoff Games In A Day


That was a good, long day of baseball.

Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Baseball Is Us


Schmaltzy and heavy-handed and overly dramatic … which may help explain why I like it so damn much:


Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

So ... That Happened

mlb_postseason_01
C'mon, MLB, give the SLPL some good old fashioned home runs, wilya?
Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

The Playoffs Have Begun ... and Standings Are Posted

mlb_postseason_01
We're up and running!

And, dang, that game. Those Nats. Nice way to start a playoff season!
Playoffs . Regular Season . Pay Already

Comments

Skip, Barry, Bluto and Jawline. "Oh, My God!"

Guys! I want the video of what happens just off screen, to the left. What we see are all those sad sack Indians fans fighting (hey, I can empathize … this was a brutal weekend). As Skip, Barry, and Bluto tumble and crumble down the aisles, a sad sack cop takes a spill into a seat just to the lower left of us. One minute it's an empty seat with sunglasses on the ground, the next second it's Sergeant Jawline, dazed and confused after slamming his ass into the folding seat. Where's video of that, I ask you?

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

I Remember When

Hole. E. Cow.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

8-2-4 To Complete the Double Play

I mean, c'mon! This is fun.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

I'd Do It

I'd hop into that time machine, fershure.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

At Least We Have the Nicknames

I don't fully understand the concept of Players' Weekend, but some of the nicknames are fun.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Happy Nolan Ryan Day

Respect!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Cooler Heads Need to Prevail

We missed a bit while we were away and sick. Let's start with our favorite thing we missed, which was Amir Garrett taking on the entirety of the Pirates team, a thing to behold.

Or, rather:

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Deep Dive On Gaylord

It's either nostalgia or it's CSI-ing a long-ago train wreck, but I have found myself even more intrigued by Gaylord Perry's career after watching that Letterman interview. This here article is a nice recap to his infamous legacy. My only quibble is the use of the word "allegedly." I mean, just look at the subtitle of his book:


You know?

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

It Boggles

How is this guy in the Hall-of-Fame?

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Speaking of Gaylord Perry

An hour or two after we posted yesterday's snark about "Ball Four" not being as good as "Me and the Spitter," we saw this fascinating article posted by SI. Interestingly, this article about Gaylord Perry starts with a quote from Jim Bouton's "Ball Four." The universe, man. The universe.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

"Ball Four"

It was no "Me and the Spitter," but "Ball Four" was really something.
By the way, I am clearly joking about "Me and the Spitter." While I was in the Gaylord Perry fan club and read his book at least a half a dozen times as a 10-year-old, I know it doesn't measure up to "Ball Four," like, in any universe.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Samuel Lewis Crowned 2019 All-Star Champ (Assuming We Tracked Things Correctly)

2019 ASG 1

He was on of five owners to get Pete Alonso's Derby points, but he was the only owner of those seven to also have Gallo's All-Star Game points, which means Max Scherzer's Blue Eye owner Samuel Lewis is this year's first official Santa Lechuga Power League champ, the 2019 All-Star Champ*. With this win Samuel pulls 100 cool clams out of the coffers and the adoration of 27 other owners who would have preferred to be the winner of those 100 cool clams. Oh, and that number of clams could go up if paid trading activity is high enough this season.

Congratulations to Samuel Lewis on his 2019 All-Star Championship!
*This assumes we didn't make any mistakes. Which is to say, we may have messed up some of the math here since we had to manually enter all All-Star stats for every team in the league. If we made any mistakes, please notify us ASAP so that we can make corrections. You will find our tracking under the All-Star Stats tab in our boffo spreadsheet!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

We Have a Few All-Star Leaders

2019 ASG 0

Several, in fact, after Pete Alonso won last night's Home Run Derby. Here are the All-Star standings through last night:

Screen Shot 2019-07-09 at 10.58.19 AM


By the way, you should know this going into tonight's All-Star Game:

  • Hitters earn 150 points for every home run hit
  • Hitters lose 25 points for every K
  • Pitchers earn 25 points for every K
  • Pitchers lose 75 points for every homer surrendered

The team with the most combined points — Home Run Derby points plus All-Star Game points — will win the All-Star Championship.

BTW, points earned in this category are allocated exclusively to the All-Star Standings and are not allocated to the Overall Standings.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Tonight Is the Home Run Derby

2019 ASG 2

Tonight is the Home Run Derby. If a player on your roster wins the All-Star Home Run Derby, your team picks up 250 points towards the All-Star standings. Points earned in this category are allocated exclusively to the All-Star Standings and are not allocated to the Overall Standings.

Good luck to you!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Derby Tomorrow, All-Star Game Tuesday

2019 ASG 3

Remember, if you want to make trades to ensure you have players competing in the Home Run Derby, you have to submit your trade before 11:59 pm tonight. If you want players before the 2019 All-Star Game, you need to submit the trades by 11:59 pm Monday. Good luck to all!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

The All-Star Game Is Around the Corner

2019 ASG 0

The 2019 All-Star Game is just around the corner. As a reminder of how that works:

How do I score points for the All-Star Standings?

During the Home Run Derby...
If a player on your roster wins the All-Star Home Run Derby, your team picks up 250 points

During the All-Star Game...

  • Hitters earn 150 points for every home run hit
  • Hitters lose 25 points for every K
  • Pitchers earn 25 points for every K
  • Pitchers lose 75 points for every homer surrendered

The team with the most combined points — Home Run Derby points plus All-Star Game points — will win the All-Star Championship.

BTW, points earned in this category are allocated exclusively to the All-Star Standings and are not allocated to the Overall Standings.

Incidentally, if you want to make trades to ensure you have players competing int he Home Run Derby, you have to submit your trade before 11:59 pm Sunday. If you want players before the All-Star Game, you need to submit the trades by 11:59 pm Monday.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Oh, Damn

Yet another tip of the ballcap to Maddog's Maulers owner Mike Skoien, this time for this submission. Mike is dogging the team from Flushing, saying "And this is just another reason the Mets are so bad!" Oh, damn!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Minnesotans Handling Homers

Tip of the ballcap to Maddog's Maulers owner Mike Skoien giving us this blog fodder about ten days back. Mike is bragging here, saying "This is how we Minnesotans handle home runs! 😂😂😂" Thanks, Mike!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

No, It Really Hasn't Gotten Out of Hand

Tip of the ballcap to Maddog's Maulers owner Mike Skoien for sending us this link with the comment "I don't know, I think this league kind of digs this trend!" Indeed we do, Mike. Indeed we do.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

What A Wonderful Idea

Tip of the ballcap to Maddog's Maulers owner Mike Skoien for sending us this link with the comment "More home runs and strikeouts! Somebody should create a fantasy league around that model!!" Good sir, I believe you might be onto something there. Let's throw a committee at the idea.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

To the Left, to the Left

Fun.


Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

What Sport Are We Playing?

In some circumstances, it makes sense to punt.


Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Drop Everything

Tip of the ballcap to Uncle Vanya's Morphine's owner Joe Livernois for sending us this story, filed under the heading "At Least You're Not This Guy."

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

The Best Player You Never Saw

It's an old article, but complete worthy read (or re-read).

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

New Normal?

Good question.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

That's Sierraload, Good Sir

Tip of the ballcap to Maddog's Maulers owner Mike Skoien for sending us this link (which may be behind a paywall) and saying "Article from Friday's Washington Post has important information for SLPL owners: 1) MLB players are hitting a ****load of homers at a record pace, 2) Do not own a pitcher from the Baltimore Orioles, and of course 3) The ball is "juiced," or, according to this article it has a lower drag coefficient making it fly farther ... duh!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Ozuna Or Later

That didn't go as planned, did it?


Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Privileged

Man, what an essay by Kyle Korver.

Meanwhile, here's the reaction from a great number of white people when asked to listen:


Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

That's Some Real Bull Sierra

My last week in the SLPL.


Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Plumbing the Depths

What it was like being a Cleveland Indians fan in the 1970s and 1980s.


Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Craven Bastard

Oh! Hey! Look! It's the POS who who just keeps S-ing on everything!


Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

"Major League" Is 30?!?!

In the first episode of this season's Sunday Morning Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, we are told that the movie "Major League" is 30 years old. W?! T?! F?! Holy, hell!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

"Literally Us, the Blue Jays"

Excuse us while we spend the rest of our Friday laughing our assess off.


Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Uni Watch

Maddog's Maulers owner Michael Skoien sent this cool article to us before the season kicked off, but we thought it was too good not to share. He said, "This might be a nostalgic and somewhat irreverent read during March Madness as we prepare for the kickoff of BASEBALL!!" Thanks, Michael!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Make That Five

Five trades are in the books now in this early season, and better than the fact that we have a hungry group of owners is that said same owners are also bitter and carrying a chip on their shoulders. For example, Ochre Sox owner Ray Brennan said about his trade: "Stanton goes on the DL, which in this case means Disabled List, not the Down Low. What the frick is it with these 'jocks' (do they even wear them anymore??) and their injuries? Maybe the teams ought to hire trainers and doctors and purchase exercise equipment to keep these tender little flowers in playing shape."

Ah, yes, that's the seething bitterness we so love.

Meanwhile, Dongwhpped owner Kevin Klinkhamer had this to say about his trade: "First time I take Stanton to begin a year and it only took him a weekend to turn into a foxtrotting clown."

Yes, please, more of that.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Four Trades Already

Remember what we said yesterday about istilled Awesomeness">awesomeness distilled? About enhanced competition? Yeah, well, with only a weekend's worth of games in the can, three owners have already made trades. Which is to say, this league ain't messing around. If you want to compete, you've gotta use some trades!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Distilled Awesomeness

If you missed it yesterday, our website is up-and-running! Yay, right? That means our stats and standings are all up to date, so check 'em out.

Anyway, given that we have a smaller league — distilled awesomeness, is what we like to call it — we have had to make a few adjustments, as you might've imagined. With eight fewer teams for a total of 28, we elected to have four divisions of seven teams, which eliminates two division payouts and cranks up the competition, big time. We have also adjusted the various and sundry lower-level payouts to make sure our Regular Season and Overall Champs are getting the hefty coin to which they've become accustomed. Here's how we're spreading the purse as of today:

The 2019 Pot


We're doing all of this in a vacuum, though, so feel free to give us your commentary. If you think we should be approaching things differently, let us know with an impassioned, though not whiny, message using the form at this link. We believe we can be reasoned with, so be reasonable. And not whiny. We hate whiny.

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

We're Up and Running!

Our website is up-and-running!

Our stats and standings are up-and-running! As before, we are using a mambo-jumbo spreadsheet that is converted to a webpage, so look for the tabs at the bottom of the page to navigate the various pages of information, including how our sweet pot is calculated and distributed.

Please do us a favor and go to the Rosters tab to take a look-see at your roster. What are you checking for? To make sure we didn’t bungle anything, which is wicked-easy to do when you’re manually entering 15 players for 28 teams players. If we made a mistake, let us know by making a trade here and explaining our mistake in the Message at the bottom of that page.

Once again, welcome to the 2019 Santa Lechuga Power League! Good luck!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Welcome to the 2019 Santa Lechuga Power League!

Thanks for joining the 2019 edition of the Santa Lechuga Power League! You will be happy to know:
  • We have 28 teams, a dip from recent seasons, which means the deadweight of lazy, apathetic, struggling owners from previous seasons is gone and the competition is more concentrated
  • Given the above, this should be a tough, hard-fought, awesome season!
  • We have a healthy $2800 pot to kick things off
  • Our website — you are looking at it right now — along with our stats and standings will be fully up-and-running early next week (sorry about that folks, but we're headed to Michigan for the weekend and won't be able to work on league-related things until we get back)
Here are the standings from our stats provider through yesterday's big Opening Day:

Opening Day 2

Welcome to the 2019 SLPL! Good luck. We really hope you enjoy the five-cent Tequila Poppers and our trademarked Cabbage-On-a-Stick!

Standings and Stats . Make A Trade . Pay Already

Comments

Kathy Lamkin Crowned 2019 SLPL HOF Death Pool Champ!

Hey, look at us! We give out money when the season begins!

With the first pitch of today’s first game, Make Fantasy Baseball Great Again! owner Kathy Lamkin was officially* crowned the 2018 winner of the Phil Rizzuto Memorial Hall-of-Fame Death Pool, thereby officially closing out the 2018 season. “I would like to thank Red Schoendienst and Frank Robinson for allowing me to scrape $225 out of the pot. I didn't want them to die, but, look, we all die. I'm sure Red and Frank would be happy to know their deaths went to a good cause,” Kathy said after being crowned champ. “And before you get all mad at me for saying that, look, I'm getting ready to move. Every dollar I earn means a lot to me.”

*When we say "officially," we mean that as of right now we know of no other Hall-of-Famers who died before today’s first pitch since Frank Robinson walked into the Iowa cornfields in February. If news stories come through that someone kicked it before this afternoon’s games, we'll have to revise our officialness status and see what shakes out.

For Those Interested In Such Things
Here’s how the Hall-of-Fame Death Pool points are scored: Points are earned by subtracting the reported age of the dirt-napper at the time of his death (rounded down to the most-recent birthday) from 100 and multiplying the result by 5. So:
• An 80-year-old would get 100-80=20*5=100 points.
• A 40-year-old would get 100-40=60*5=300 points.

And here’s how the Magic Number works: The team with the Magic Number closest to the Date-of-Death (DoD) will get an extra 25 points. If that team's Magic Number matches the DoD, the team will instead get 50 extra points.

For Those Creeped Out by Such Things
Here's how we justify to ourselves having a Hall-of-Fame Death Pool: "Their major contributions to the world already behind them, baseball Hall-of-Famers will never get the glory they received on the day they were inducted into the Hall-of-Fame until their funerals. We honor living HOFers by putting them into a Death Pool and hoping they will soon receive that final glorious moment in the sun … before they are buried or cremated."

Congratulations, Kathy!
Comments

The 2019 Season Has Officially Begun!


The SLPL Bobblehead-of-Lettuce


Good luck to one and all!

While we get our act together and set up the league, here are some MLB links — also found in the menu bar up top — you might find useful during the season:

See the 2019 Rules | Pay Your Entry Fee

Comments

The 2019 SLPL Season Is Officially About To Launch


Getchyer roster in, STAT!

See the 2019 Rules | Submit a Roster | Pay Your Entry Fee | Adjust a Submitted Roster Here

Comments

No user-identifying information from this website is shared with third-party servers. We thought you should know.